What I Did Over Summer Vaction: A Report From a Teacher

   As August comes to a close and the school year zooms towards me, I find myself once again awake during the wee hours of the morning.  Why can’t I sleep?  Sleep eludes me because my brain is much to busy.  There are too many things to contemplate: lesson plans, seat arrangements, kids clothes to buy, new tattoo ideas, money and where, oh where, did the summer go?  I will soon be greeting my new students, in a new classroom, in a new grade.  (I am not feeling stressed, I am not feeling stressed.)  As I greet this new batch of youngster and get to know them, the first topic of conversations typical begins with, “What did you do this summer?”  So to calm and focus my mind I will give my report on what I did this summer.
    I worked three days a week tutoring students in math and reading.  I enjoyed the opportunity to work one on one with kids and focus on their needs.  It’s a nice change and helpful perspective to experience after working with 20-24 students the rest of the year.  Also, I’m a teacher, therefore I need the extra income. I spent many hours each of those three days a week planning tutoring lessons.  The other extra hours I found myself at school I used to move into a new classroom and become familiar with Class II.  I’ll be teaching second grade for the first time this year and there is a lot to learn.
    I spent MANY nights this summer having “School Dreams.”  These are common for teachers to experience.  However, my dreams started in June.  In my dreams I’d often show up for work and it was the first day of school.  School had started earlier than I expected and my classroom wasn’t ready.  Other nights they’d rearrange the building plans, change my room on me and I couldn’t find it.  One dream had me cramming a bedroom into a corner of my classroom, like a college dormitory, where I was expected to live throughout the school year.  I then also had to fit my normal classroom full of books, desks and shelves into the same space.  They moved the offices into busy hallway spaces and I trashed their cubicles out of anger.  Changing grades and classrooms has been a large part of my dreams.  My dreams rarely strayed to the norm where I frequently spend time yelling at three particular in-laws.
    I went to some fun concerts this summer.  I saw Michael Franti with my sisters.  Concrete Blonde and Carlos Cornia with Mike and his siblings. Kings of Leon with a whole bunch of family, including my teenagers.  I enjoyed each of these concerts and wish I had more money to go to more concerts.  We were supposed to see U2 twice, but Bono got hurt and they rescheduled.  Live music was a highlight o my summer.
    I made a deal with my 13 year old daughter.  I love to embarrass her.  I tease, but I’m also very frank and ask lots of questions.  I tease that I’m the “after school special” mom.  Sex, drugs, rock and roll, no topic do I avoid.   I want to be honest and talk about the pros and cons of temptations and choices she’ll have to make.  Then I want her to make smart, hopefully logical decisions.  Finally one day as she was brushing me off with her, “Okay, okay, I know, I know. Mom please stop talking.” 
    I said this to her, “I’ll bargain with you.  You can annoy me with your ‘Please, please,’ begging and your ‘ It’s not fair’ pouting, and I can embarrass you all I want.”  She gets to be annoying, I get to be embarrassing.  Mostly it’s worked.
    I went to my 20 Year High School Reunion.  I’m one of those people who gets excited for these things.  I like people and facebook has made it even more exciting to see people you talk to often.  Of course, instead of losing 50 lbs. like most people do for these types of things, I gained 50 lbs., but that’s life.  I still loved seeing people.  Especially people who hadn’t been there 10 years ago.  I had the best time talking to a guy who remembered me better than I remembered him, but he was the most fun to talk to.  A good friend and on again off again boyfriend throughout high school had seemed to drop off the face of the earth, then suddenly he was there to see again.  I had a blast and wished I had more time to talk to more people.  Unfortunately, I didn’t want to make my ride stay up too late.  It made me think 10 years is way too long.  More people remembered me than I thought would.  I’ve changed a lot, it was fun to see people’s reactions.
    After my high school reunion we had a family reunion of sorts.  It didn’t go very well, and unfortunately, how poorly it ended up was not a surprise to me.  It was tiring, took a lot of avoiding, watching what I said and trying to buffer people.  It was survival mode week for my family.  Feelings were hurt, offenses were taken, but I really don’t know how it could be avoided.  There are many perspectives and I don’t know how they’re ever going to coincide.  Looking back I think my wish is that more people would have stood up for themselves and each other.  I just worried about the consequence of how my actions would effect others.  It was complicated and remains so.
    I didn’t write any books this summer.  I’m a little disappointed.  I just didn’t seem to have time.  I didn’t blog much either.  Again the time seem to slip away.  One of my favorite and most powerful experiences of the summer was a writing opportunity with my sisters.  I am so proud, overwhelmed, and grateful for the experience.  It was truly and important event in my life.  We wrote a five part series telling our individual experiences with my dad’s cancer and death.  I think it was excellent writing and unique in the view from five different perspectives.  If you haven’t read it check out early blog post here @http://meremayjohn.blogspot.com/ or my sister’s blog http://www.theinquisitivemom.blogspot.com/.  I’ve been amazed at people’s reactions and it was a great bonding moment before the later storm of the family reunion.
    Well, now that I’ve gotten a lot off my chest, maybe I can go to sleep.  If I could just stop imagining and designing the two tattoo ideas I have in my head.  I sketched a little bit.  Also, my family (hubby) will not be thrilled that I’m obsessing over these sudden creative urges that I can seem to stop planning.

Revealing the Secret of the Art of Teaching

     Trying to see the world from the perspective of someone else is something I try to teach my children and my students.  It is also something that I enjoy doing as a teacher and a mother, often with humorous results.  I love watching my toddler discover new things like the meaning of  red lights and green lights.
    “The light is green, we can go mom.  Like Go Dog Go.”
     A simple concept that I follow automatically daily, but it's suddenly exciting as I watch him make connections.
    I asked my students to finish common ideas about teaching, education and learning.  Exactly what do they think it means to be a teacher?  Why is learning important?  Is education important?  Here are the results that I found the most enjoyable:

To teach is to... have fun. 
I like a teacher who gives you...no homework.
The moment you stop learning, you...start thinking.
I am always ready to learn, but...not ready for homework.
You cannot teach a... teacher.
Anyone who stops learning is...going to have a hard time later on. 
The moment you stop learning, you...are free.
I am always ready to learn, but... I get sleepy.
The art of teaching is...getting stressed.
I am always ready to learn, but... I don’t like learning.
The moment you stop learning, you...throw a party at your house or mine.
The art of teaching is...hard.
You cannot teach a...dork.
The moment you stop learning, you...become a hobo.
The art of teaching is... getting the questions asked.
I am always ready to learn, but...learning is for kids.
You cannot teach a...math class if you don’t know math.
A good teacher is like a... manager.
I am always ready to learn, but...not really.
A teacher is one who...has had lots of school.
A good teacher is like a... mom always helping.
I am always ready to learn, but...I’m not always ready to fight.
To teach is to... have fun.
The teacher who is indeed wise does not...give wrong answers.
The best teachers teach from...scratch.
A teacher is one who... loves school.
The teacher who is indeed wise does not...yell.
The object of education is to prepare the young to...complain.
    And finally my absolute favorite:
        The secret of teaching...the teacher’s lounge.

What Standardized Tests Really Measure

    Standardized testing can be a useful tool in education.  Unfortunately, too much emphasis is put on testing and they are over used.  A standardized test can show a piece of the puzzle when it comes to a child’s education and learning, but rarely the whole picture.  Due to their misuse I view them as a necessary evil of teaching.  When I’m preparing my students I tell them that these tests are for gathering information.  Standardized tests help parents, teachers and schools see where kids have strengths or weaknesses.  They can also show me patterns where I can improve as a teacher.  Tests help the school plan.  Tests are tools for gathering information, that’s how I explain it to my third graders.
    However, if I were to be frank, standardized testing is the biggest, time consuming, pain in the butt.  Testing is supposed to gather information about reading, writing and math, but it is just as likely to gather completely different information.   Sometimes testing provides information about fine motor skills; how well can an eight or nine year old fill in a small bubble with a pencil?  Other times attention span, following directions, or just remembering not to skip pages is tested.  Occasionally standardized testing informs me that a student freezes when being timed.  Standardized testing is just plain stressful for teachers and students.
    The stress begins with filling out the front cover.  At our school third grade is their first experience with standardized tests.  The chaos begins with the box labeled “Sex.”  Let the giggling begin.  Next, comes a very long discussion about race.  I explain that each of the categories has to do with where the majority of their ancestors came from.  I also tell them that they should go home and discuss with their parents which bubble they should fill in.  Then, almost every hand in the class goes up as every child shares their ancestry.  Many want to know which bubble to fill in if they’re French, German and Irish or some other European combination.  Some ask what to do if their grandpa came from Australia or Canada?  When it gets this complicated and it shouldn’t be, I tell them once again, “Go ask your parents.”
    The real fun commences when the actual testing begins.  Part of what makes a test standardized is that they are given the same way, with the same directions.  Every time we start a new test I must read a scripted set of directions.  These directions only change for one of the tests.  There are eight different tests.  Written into the directions, twice, is: “Are there any questions?”  Meaning does the test taker understand how to take the test.  Remember I teach third graders.  Third graders who have never taken standardized tests before.  It seems to me that when they hear, “Are there any questions?” my students think they have to ask a question.  It is these questions, each time I give the same directions, that make me want to laugh and cry this week.  Let me share a few examples.
    The test our school administers is called ERB.  The name of the test has been a huge concern to my class.  A few times when I have asked if there are any questions their queries have been:
    “My mom said she used to take the SAT’s, why do we take the ERB’s?”
    “My cousin takes a test called The Stanford, why is it different than our test?”
It is of course normal for third graders to be curious about these things, but frustrating that they are asking these questions during the directions for the test.  Also, I explained last week that ERB was the brand of test.  Just like there are different brands of ice cream: Dreyers, Breyers, Ben and Jerry’s, there are different companies who create tests.  Our school chooses to use the ERB’s.
    During the second, “Are there any questions now?” pause in the directions a hand waved wildly in the front.  “Mrs. Johnson, if we are supposed to be taking the ERB’s, why does it say ERB on the bottom of the page and CTP 4 on the top of the page?”
    It’s only the first day and luckily I still have patience.  I calmly explain that ERB is the brand, like Ben and Jerry’s, CTP 4 is the flavor, like vanilla.  This seems to satisfy all curiosity and concern.
    Some other questions that were asked when I gave directions throughout the testing process were:
   
    “Are you sure I’m white?”
    “What makes a #2 pencil different?”
    “Do I HAVE TO read the page with the examples?”
    “Why does it list Asian, Asian American and Pacific Islander together?”
    “The note said to get plenty of sleep this week.  If I got seven hours of sleep last night do you think I    got enough sleep?”
    “Do you think this pencil is sharp enough?”
    “What should I do if I accidentally drop my pencil and it rolls away?”
    “Why are there two test booklets?”
    “Why are there two math sections?”
    “Who decides how much time we get for each test?”
    “Has anyone ever gotten every question right on this test?”
    “Will there be any history sections?”
    “If we all fail a test will you lose your job?”
    “Is this a fill in the bubble test again?”
   
    The first page of each test tells the student how much time is allowed and how many questions.  However, on seven out of the eight test one student asked, “How many pages will there be on this test?” 
    So, what exactly do standardized tests measure?  From my experience they mostly measure a teacher’s patience.