I AM WOMAN HEAR ME ROAR...

...Because I don't mean to be roaring, but the emotion is taking over the logic, and there is nothing I can do about.   Before you read beware, this blog includes:  tmi, little sleep (the current time is 4:44 am), and a mind too full of thoughts to even doze.

The same thought keeps running through my head: There is no way God is a woman.  I know this topic has been debated before.  I am sure there are many comedy acts or skits that have tackled this idea.  Maybe it's just  feminine frustration or too many discussions about religion lately, but I needed to vent.  Nobody, but family mostly, read this blog, so I won't offend too many people.  Also, a quick reminder, my emotions have taken over my logic this weekend.

There is no way God is a woman, or at least not the God I always pictured in my head and heart for many years. Maybe if I believed in Gods and Goddess like the ancient Greeks and Romans, I could believe God was a woman.  Don't get me wrong, the feminist in me loves the idea of a woman in charge of the universe, but I just can't believe any woman would have created the female reproductive system.  No woman would ever wish "monstrating" (a adept description from my favorite "Modern Family" episode) on another woman.  Of course if the Heavenly being really is Greek or Roman then it all makes sense, the female reproductive system really is a curse.  Hera can be very vengeful when pissed off.  Okay, who messed with Zeus, this is all your fault!

Back to my original thought, God can't be a woman, because no woman I know would wish monthly, week long mood swings, migraines, cramps, diarrhea, back aches, exhaustion, tender breasts, lack of iron, heavy bleeding, and any other ailment that a woman has experienced during her period.  (I could only think of my symptoms or the symptoms of people I complained with during our menstrual cycles.  There are many more aches and inconveniences I'm sure.)  A female god might wish a  few of those things on women, if you believe God needs to give us trials to overcome and grow from.  Giving women most of those symptoms MONTHLY, no way, she would never be that cruel.  I mean even if you bought half of the idealistic crap they taught my daughter at her "Maturation Tea," like what a blessing or wonderful part of nature it is to be able to have children,  you still wouldn't wish it on your daughter or friends. 

Speaking of pregnancy, would a female god make gestation nine months?  (I know, don't tell about how long an elephant is pregnant, right now I'm on humans.  Animals and gods are a whole other discussion.  Unless, the female god is ruled by an elephant spirit, then maybe it all makes more sense.)  I doubt it.  Who would choose so long to give up their body?  That is what happens, not everyone seems to comprehend that (most men.)  A woman's body gets nauseas, exhausted, fat, bloated, achy, and sore when she's pregnant.  That just what her body does.  She also has to give up any bad habits.  I think smoking is a bad thing and I didn't drink until after I had kids, but if I had I would have given those up.  Of course if the man in my life happened to have those same vices he need not quit, just smoke outside perhaps.  Sometimes we even have to give up good habits and things it's okay to love.  Like cats for some people or sports for others.  I had to give up hockey, both ice and roller.  Okay, I still scrimmaged with the kids during their roller practice for several months, but I couldn't keep it up for long.  None of my male counter parts have ever had to make that sacrifice and it pisses me off. 

So, in conclusion, I will restate that God is not a woman.  I would not, nor any woman I know, make women have a monthly period or give up their bodies for nine months of pregnancy.  The hell that is "mother nature's little gift" is not a present I would pass on if I was in control.  I am not, however, in control as I stated in the beginning.  The emotion has overtaken the logic in my brain and that is why this idea of God and his sex has kept me awake.  Venting this unneeded knowledge has calmed me somewhat.  Thanks.  Now should I try to sleep for an hour or just start getting ready for work?  I'm too tired to make that decision.

Tattoos and Thank-Yous

These tattoos were inked Christmas of 2010.  The book spines have my children's names on them.  They are both on my lower back.

"Mrs. Johnson?" one of my third graders asked as I was bending over to tape student work to our classroom door.            

                                                                                                                 

  "Yes?" I inquired, turning to look at her.      

                                                            

"Thank you for teaching us math" she said with a hug.                                                      

Surprised, I squeezed her back and thanked for the compliment.    

                                                          

 "Are you enjoying that I assignment?" I questioned, "Is it a little challenging, but fun?"

   I was thrilled with her seeming enthusiasm for the math assignment.             

                                    

"No," she replied, "I'm just reading your back.              

                                                   

 "My back?" I replied puzzled, "Did someone stick a note on my back?"  Third graders would think that a very funny joke to pull on the teacher.                                                                                    

                                                                          

 "No," she answered and pointed to my lower back, "your back!"